Home How Long?!?

I think it is 10 weeks this Friday, but now can start counting in months. Nice to be able to do that. We are almost into what will be our "usual" routine - still a bit off right now because Jaden is going to various camps these last 3 weeks as she has done most of the summer. So Harper gets to be confused as to whether Jaden is dropped off before or after she goes to daycare (started full-time last week), and where she is going! Jaden is currently at Critter Camp and Harper enjoys seeing the various animals when we drop off and pick up her big sister. I have a feeling I will be taking Harper there for camp in the coming years.

Harper has done fantastic at daycare. No big separation anxiety - just wants me to pick her up one final time and give her a kiss. I tell her "mommy has to go to work" (and try not to sigh!) and she is good to go find something or someone to play with. There is one little 5-year old girl in particular who has taken Harper under her wing - Bailey, we will miss you after this week as you go off to kindergarten! Harper is not too thrilled with the lunches, but they do come from the next door catering company and have always looked tasty to me. I hope with time she develops some like for the selection (just tonight we stopped by the Chinese restaurant again for noodles). And come nap time, they tell me she is excited to get out her cot, lies down, and takes a 1-2 hour nap. I have about given up on the weekends as there is no such cooperation for me!

The "sleep issue" with Harper suddenly took a turn for the better a few days ago. The last 4 nights she has slept through, and I have returned to my own bed (it feels quite indulgent). About 2 weeks ago I decided to park a mattress in her room and then it was easy to reassure her I was right there without even lifting my head!! She was stuffy a few nights ago and so I thought I would just try starting out in my own bed, and lo and behold, I was still there in the morning. Four consecutive nights is Harper's US record (if you followed the blog in China, she slept beautifully EVERY night while there), so finger's crossed for tonight, and the next night.... I know she will have those bad nights, but the whole house runs better if everyone gets some good rest.

And here are some pics from the last few weeks (in chronological order, kind of). Thanks again, Kim, for your contributions!

Local mall has fun water feature. Too bad she didn't have a swim diaper on!

Looking older, right? (sorry, can't figure out right now how to rotate!)

She is mostly smiley, and recent trip to dentist says all her teeth look good!

She LOVES to throw out trash. I call her fastidious.

Sent from daycare director on Harper's first day with label "she fits in perfectly!" It was gooey-messy week,
and on this day the kids played with shaving cream.

A clean frog.

Sent again from daycare director earlier this week. She was saying "look at me!", which
she says all the time, unfortunately often while I am driving!

Don't tell Harper, but Jaden and I have quite a lot of fun after
she goes to bed!!

Home Almost 6 Weeks

The lack of posting equates to the lack of free time. We have been doing the day-to-day stuff and fun stuff, too. Trips to the zoo and SeaWorld this past week. The adjusting for Harper continues but I think going all in the right direction. She has a couple more weeks before the transition to full-time daycare and I hope it will be more traumatic for me than her! She is saying many words and very pleased with herself; it would be great if her comprehension and speaking of English would all click soon. When we go to get her noodles (still her favorite thing by far!), the people in the restaurants will often speak Mandarin to her, and she always looks distressed. Triggers memories?

One "issue" we are having is with Harper waking up 1-3 times/night, most nights, but thankfully not all. She just needs to see me and she will lie down again and often be asleep in minutes. Me, not so quickly, and this has been a lot physically harder on me than traveling solo to China - much harder! I figure she must have had a co-sleep arrangement with her foster mother and so waking up alone in her room is alarming. But the frequency of her wee hour calls is slowing down and she is not as distressed when she calls out, so I just have to be patient and see how it goes. In all other ways, she is wonderful and I know to be thankful for that!

Another "issue" is Harper's adoration of Jaden. The honeymoon period for Jaden is over. She declares often that her baby sister is "annoying" as Harper climbs on her, insists she puts on her shoes, grabs her stuff, etc. There is still an underpinning of care and concern, however, so I think this is normal and will hopefully transform into a mutually enjoyable sibling relationship. How hard it must be for Jaden to share her world with a head-strong toddler, albeit sweet and funny? I need to be mindful to carve out time for just Jaden, but for now it is that 30-45 min between when the girls go to bed.

Enjoy the pictures! Thanks again to friend Kim for so many cute ones!

Miss Harper (pre-haircut).

The sisters after a trip to the mall's candy store.

First haircut, complete with bow (lasted about 10 min);
note me in the reflection working the camera.

As I said, the honeymoon is over!

Harper's love of the water has increased in recent weeks.

Trip to the San Diego zoo on 4th of July.

Thanks to friend Nora for coming with us to the zoo and accommodating
Harper's requests for up-down-up-down... (and sorry I cut off your head!).

The girls in Poppa's chair at G'ma's house. He would have enjoyed them so
much if he were still with us.

Finishing off our trip to SeaWorld last weekend with Shamu ice creams!

Home for 3 Weeks

The first week or two home seemed really long thanks to jet lag, but now time is picking up again. Harper is still busy and in almost constant motion when at home. She can also be calm and stay in one place for quite a while when I need her to be (e.g., meeting at work that lasted 1.5 hours, hair appointment). I am back at work part-time, sans Harper except for visits, and teaching my three classes at the gym. She seems to be doing well with this additional major adjustment and accepts and enjoys her caregivers. I have been able to leave Jaden with her in some cases and that is the best. She will start in full-time daycare at the end of July - for now she has a wonderful manny two days/week and an occasional favorite babysitter, Maddison, or good friend and sitter, Diane.

Jaden continues to impress me with her increasing maturity and sweet, helpful nature towards her sister. And it is definitely a "monkey see, monkey do" relationship that has been very helpful in many cases, mostly getting Harper comfortable in water. This last week was big - Harper stripping down and standing by the bathtub whenever the mood strikes her (often), "swimming" in the pool, and joining me or Jaden in the shower. Water on her head still gives her some momentary panic, but that is getting better. There are lots of pictures to document this major transformation.

Harper still loves noodles over all else (she just cried when I told her she ate all of them at lunch), and yogurt has become a favorite. She is finicky about most other foods and some days gives a "yes", other days a "no". I try to have a lot of choices on hand, and keep trying new things. I have not really found one meal we all like yet outside of noodles...

The only tough part now is the communication. As she has become more comfortable with me, she will say something in Mandarin (or baby talk Mandarin - who knows?) and be totally annoyed because I have no idea what she means. Usually the context is known and I can figure it out, but not always. Her comprehension of English is increasing daily, and she will readily mimic us. And uses words that she knows spontaneously. Cute today I handed her some watermelon and she said "tat yu"!

The sisters having fun together.

Harper enjoying a yogurt popsicle.

Harper and Jaden in pool with friend, Grant (Diane's brother-in-law).

Harper at our association's kiddie pool (nice as it is 1 foot water height throughout).

Competing water interests - Mickey for a drink, Harper for hand washing.
Jaden helping out.

Pictures from the Week

Some more from last Sunday, and additional ones through today.  Thanks to the friends that shot some goodies, too.

(credit: VI Photos)

Add with picture above to see "sister" shirts! (I assured Jaden
I would Photoshop the man out before pic went into the scrapbook!)
(credit: VI Photos - Kim!)

Mellow Miss Harper (credit: Lina)

At today's end-of-year party at Jaden's school. Harper enjoying
her first smoothie.

Such nice smiles, and at the same time!

Adjustments

So many things for Harper to adjust to, as well as Jaden, me, and the cats!  I think we are progressing towards a new set of routines, but still a ways to go. Harper is for the most part sleeping through the night, although she had some reason to be up at 3 am the night before last, which led to a few cat naps yesterday, and then a bed time after her sister last night. I hope to get the bedtime routine sorted out this week.

I am still finding things that Harper likes to eat. Maybe she is more finicky than I originally thought in that one day she will eat lots of something (e.g., egg) and the next day turns up her nose. Cheerios and other "favorite" snacks get the same response. But she likes a lot bananas, apples, and melon. I am still giving her a bottle with toddler formula since she will not yet drink milk from a sippy cup (or she is messing with me - she does like to tease), but will have to wean her off in the coming weeks and get her ready for drinking from an open cup as will be done at daycare.

Jaden and Harper for the most part get along wonderfully. Harper LOVES watching and imitating her sister, and often hands something to Jaden for her to do and not me (e.g., toothbrush, shoe to put on). And Jaden is mostly patient and kind to her, with some sporadic periods of exasperation as it is hard to turn Harper "off" once she is wound up. They both love the playground/park and we are checking out different ones in our area. Jaden has accomplished the monkey bars this year and it is her challenge to traverse all that she finds multiple times. This delights Harper who I just need to make sure is out of the way of swinging feet. And Harper's favorite is the slide; the swing is fun for a minute and then her face clouds over and she wants off.

Jaden can also be credited with turning Harper from a bath hater to a bath lover. Part of the success I also found was giving her the washcloth as she was taught exactly how to use it. She scrubs and will even put it on her head, which if I did would elicit shrieks. And she will let me put lotion on her dry skin without protest as I got before, so big progress. And she will imitate Jaden brushing her teeth and let Jaden do her back molars. Good progress here, too!

I have taken Harper into the office a few times as I have started back at work, in a  part-time capacity mostly working at home. It is my biggest adjustment to start the juggle of kids (like that plural!), work, cats, and house stuff. And I started back at the gym last night with my usual babysitter for Harper and Jaden (I have three 1-hour classes/week; yoga and cardio). Aunt Lisa had visited at the end of last week and was the best first babysitter for Harper who is so much more aware than Jaden who was younger. This is all good preparation for daycare which starts with a nanny (er, manny) next week for 2 days/week and then full-time daycare the third week of July.

I will post more pictures soon. I definitely need to take more!

Beginning of last week. You never knew when jet lag would hit!

Aunt Lisa enjoying the girls.

Harper finding out the chair vibrates - lots of giggles!

Harper at work with mama. Still lovin' those stickers!

At grocery store. Harper intent on watching her sister's every move.

One of Jaden's favorite activities is to visit the pet store. Harper liked it, too!

Another Jaden activity shown to Harper was feeding the birds
at the mall when we have coffee time with the gals after the gym. I am not
back to weekend teaching yet, but we still partook in the social part!

Jet Lag

I can get over jet lag expertly, sans a toddler. So Harper finally fell asleep last night a little before 8 pm, but was up at midnight. We had a snack, did some puzzles, read some books, watched some Bernstain Bears on TV, and finally I declared at 3:30 am that it must be time to go back to bed (the cats agreed). She slept well until we woke her up mid-morning to go out into the sunshine. We were off with Harper in her I-do-not-like-this-so-much-its-confining carseat to "coffee" with the gals from the gym where we sit outside. Then after a late afternoon nap, we headed to a nearby park with grandma in tow. Harper really thought this was great fun.

All in all, a pretty good first full day at home for Harper. Jaden is adjusting, too, and a wonderful big sister wanting to push the stroller, feed her, and running all over the park yelling "Harper, follow me!". I can already tell that Harper is going to do some things for her sister that she will not do for me (e.g., give Jaden that battery that I have been trying to wrestle out of her tight fist). The cats are also figuring things out. Minnie is meowing her head off if Harper is crying (she did this as well with Jaden as a baby), and Mickey is enjoying checking out the toys and otherwise observing everything from a safe distance. Harper acknowledges them, saying "meow meow". She has not really touched either of them yet, but her air swipes are coming ever closer.

Both girls in bed tonight by 10:30 pm. Let's hope Harper makes it a chunk of hours, because I find jet lag makes me very loopy. And I have no idea what I did with the TV remote.... I even checked the trash! It would be nice to make Harper the scape goat, but I don't think she had anything to do with its disappearance.

Thanks to everyone who has followed along and supported my adoption adventure. The blog posts, emails, texts, and Words with Friends messages were all much appreciated and made me feel like I was sharing her before we even got home. I will post again in a week or so. Until then, pictures from the day including one from friend, Kim!

"I think I am going to like all these coffee gals." (credit: VI Photos)

"Yes, share with me jie jie!" (held by friend, Nora)

"No grandma, I don't want to hold your hand OR give you a kiss!"

"This is fun and I don't even need to hold on."

"Whoa, we are comin' down fast!"

"The park is for me!!!"

Home!

We are home! It is 6:45 pm and Harper is still on her feet. It was a long travel day, in which she did quite good on the flights. Not a cry out of her the first 8 hours of the 12 hour flight to San Francisco, but after falling asleep and never getting comfortable, she was not a happy camper. So I walked her around the plane and except for a 10 min cat nap in the car after arriving in San Diego, she has not shown an interest in sleeping since we have come home. But she is fading, I think - how can a kid with less than 2 hours of quality sleep go for 24 hours!!! Her tenacity is amazing.

And today had a first.  She was entertaining herself nicely in her seat (I owe this trip to stickers) and I kind of closed my eyes, a mini doze. I got a slug on my arm and "mama"! That was so nice; up until now she has said "mama" when prompted with a picture or looking in the mirror. And she has said it a few more times today. If she would just say "night night mama" I could get some sleep!

Jaden and Diane met us at the airport, which was great. Jaden and Harper are interacting well, and Jaden is quickly learning not to leave things she does not want Harper to have in her reach.

I will keep the blog going a tad longer as Harper explores her new life. For now, welcome home, Harper! We have waited a long time for you.

At Hong Kong airport ready to check in. And for the record,
I was able to transport all of it WITHOUT the cart.

At SFO awaiting luggage in customs. I should have known I was
in trouble as she was showing no signs of sleepiness.

Family reunion at San Diego airport. I am HAPPY to be home with
both my girls!

Sisters. Harper had all sorts of smiles and giggles for her sister's
antics. I think they will get along together just fine.

Jaden showing Harper the collection of toys awaiting her at home.

Jaden really wanted to feed Harper, and Harper, the social eater
that she is, went along with it.